post-call from Costa Rica

the way you talk when you’re vulnerable is full of pauses. you’re holding back so you don’t hurt. you say ā€œIā€ and then you give a half laugh, your breath gets caught in your throat because you’re close to crying but you don’t want to let yourself, you second-guess yourself but you’re going to say it anyway – whatever it is. you’re so mad, you miss me, you’re sad or insecure or lost and don’t know how or what to do. because I hurt you

Light 2 – Fire

July 2017 – California

Some things are better from afar
So they can’t hurt you where you are
Fire, stars
My love, romanticized for my art

These things that seem to burn so bright, oh-so warm & full of light
Might just be more than you bargained for

To add another log
You stuck your hand in the flame
I had to be gone
You had me to blame

You burned yourself trying to keep us alight
While my flame had moved on to greener pastures last night

//

God, I wish I believed you when you told me this was my home